Cats’ assault courses

February weekend – and another haul of DIY, sifting through stuff that accumulates over a few weeks and the usual cleaning tasks. I can’t face getting someone to help me clean – it goes against my principles… I make the mess so it seems awful to think of someone else helping me clear it up, but worst of all I’d be mortified that someone would find out how much of a slob I am. So out with the black bin liners and off to the skip again. The cats love it when I do this – my notion of clearing up involves pulling everything out of cupboards and making an even bigger mess, they think I’m some sort of cat god who magics assault courses up for them. My boys just disappear, they’ve grown accustomed to this frenzy of activity which usually ends in me in an even more foul temper than normal. They know the signs and are too sensible to hang around for the aftermath. This kind of cleaning also involves me making disastrous messes which then take up more time. Yesterday I discovered a big plastic thing full of paraffin from some aged heater we used twenty odd years ago, when we had no central heating. Off to the skip (who of course wouldn’t take it)…spillage inside car…three hours of visits to halfords for cleaning materials and scrubbing later, and the thing was back in the cupboard it started off in. I’ve also so far, since Friday broken a glass shelf in the bathroom and stubbed my toes three times. Being at work seems a much safer and easier option.